Good night Rockstar..tc

Now the title may not make any sense to you… But reading the blog will surely make sense out of the title. But don’t take it as incentive from my side to make you read the whole blog. Hahaha. Coz ofcourse the title “Goodnight Rockstar” will generate all kinds of fantasies, queries and expectations from this blog. And so as not to disappoint you (if at all the blog doesn’t stand up to your expectations and fantasies) I will give a brief of what is to come.

This blog is a piece of impulsive writing which was inspired by just one SMS by someone very close. It’s about my journey or rather beginning of my journey of inclination towards MUSIC. All the people not interested in music… This would be the perfect time to stop reading this blog and continue with your not so important work. “Not so important” coz if it would have been important then you would not have been reading this blog in the first place. This blog is about how I ended up buying a Guitar on impulse. Hmmm… It may not sound a big deal. But believe me… there is huge difference between buying a Rs 650 /- Tee Shirt on impulse and buying a Rs 7000 /- Guitar on impulse.

So here it goes… One fine Sunday morning I got up without the slightest hint that I would be joining a guitar class. Now that Sunday was also like any other Sundays… which simply means that it started at 11 am. Now after getting up I am always glued to the idiot box (television) for almost 2 hours (even I don’t know why… jut that old habit die hard). But not this time… Coz I saw Saif on television playing like a rockstar on television. Now that’s when I jump… freshened up… dressed up and grabbed my bike keys to head towards the nearest music classes for admission enquiry.

Now don’t start thinking that I am the most proactive stupid jerk to act so passively. Actually I have always had an inclination towards learning an instrument. Many of us do have. And if not to learn an instrument, then at least to learn something else. But we don’t do it. Coz we love to postpone our desires. Remember that trip which you are planning from months. It won’t happen. Coz you will postpone it. Remember that course you wanted to do, that exam you wanted to prepare for, that restaurant you wanted to eat out at, that routine you wanted to follow, that classes you wanted to join. All that just won’t happen. Coz as I said… YOU WILL POSTPONE IT. That’s YOU. That’s US. So on that Sunday, I jumped out my chair, and drove on my bike towards the nearest music classes known to me (and of course which I wanted to join from ages) because I did not wanted to postpone it any longer. Once I was on my way… all other things were easy. I got enrolled for guitar classes that moment itself. And also decided to attend the class that day itself.

My first class was pretty interesting and easy. It’s like you love the swimming pool as a beginner till the time you are playing in the shallow waters. But once you enter the deep waters and gulp down some water… you feel screwed. Learning Guitar is same. But then you start enjoying once the rhythm starts touching your heart and soul. The sound of music has its own ecstasy. Our body has been functioning according to our mind from too long. We do every thing told by our brain. But that’s just being like a computerized mechanical robot. We need to put our SOUL in the driving seat. Our every movement should be handed over to our soul. Then life seems to be so beautiful. And that’s when great music is created. With the soul in it. One’s soul needs to play the guitar and not just the fingers. I learned all this from my sir in guitar classes. He also say’s that musician needs to be shameless. And that’s what I am best at. He he he. So it would be quite easy. And for the first time I actually realize that the guitar is not just a thing to show off but a fine instrument to create awesome music. WOW.

The day I joined my guitar classes, I was glad as I was on my way to pursue one of my passions. MUSIC. But then it also turned out to be a bad day as I had a final showdown with one of my very close friend. Beginning and end of two things on the same day. That’s Life. So… moving on ahead in life, my next step was to buy a guitar. A good acoustic one. If that sounds too simple, kindly change your perception. With a mere budget of Rs 3,500 /- I went to buy a guitar with all the beginners info in the memory cells of my brain (gathered after days of research on Google). But as a beginner one is sure to be bogged down by the sheer number of guitars displayed and also the almost negligible sound difference that all the guitars make to a learner ears. The sales person attending me had a hell of a time because I made him play almost 10 different guitars and kept on asking the same info almost n number of times. I took one and a half hour to choose a guitar of best brand and quality. I had over shot my budget by 100 % which means double (for you weak in mathematics). But then I am crazy about quality. I am a crazy perfection finicky freak. But the real height of freakishness happened when the salesman has packed the guitar I chose with such detailing and was half way through with the billing formalities. I saw this guitar of YAMAHA brand hanging in one corner. It was actually love at first sight. I asked the salesman to stop whatever activity he was doing and simply told him to change the guitar. Now his somewhat angry + puzzled expression was so damn justified because he had spend his one hour explaining me why I should buy the guitar which was being packed. And he was successful too… until I laid my eyes on my sweetheart (YAMAHA Guitar). Now this new guitar which I chose was also sure too burn a hole in my pocket which it did fantastically coz it was worth Rs 7000 /-. Exactly double the price of what I had thought to spend initially. But as I told earlier, it’s really worth acting listening to you heart rather than the usual practical bullshit thinking we do in our daily life.

Practical thinking. Practical decisions. That’s the trend these days. Why we don’t see beyond what is more economically for us. We choose a job which would make us capable of buying a sea facing flat rather than a job which may make every working day of ours to be fun. Practical thought. Very right. We go for a partner who is capable of giving us the luxuries of life rather than the one whom we loved. Practical decision. Even parents are happy. Great. (Though not all couples do that… coz some lucky ones spend lifetime together) And slowly but steadily we start this practical decision process in every aspect of our life. But we would never know the worth of living life on impulse. From our heart. That’s why really admire artists, singers, journalists, writers, photographers etc. These people had no motive to take up these professions other than their interest. I occasionally come across people who listen to their heart and really do admire them for that. Coz I want to be like that. Just imagine that if you die and still are given a second chance in life, would you be doing the same things that you have done? Would you take the same decisions which you have taken? However minor they are.

Coming back to my musical adventure, my daily routine has a spice of music in it now. Learning music can we as enchanting as that rush of first love. Playing music can be as soothing as romance. But still I was missing something in this musical journey. I didn’t know what it was. I am fast learner. I was doing great. But still some emptiness. But then of fine day I played a melody for a very close friend of mine. I played it with a shyness of a beginner. But still played it pretty well. It was not up to the perfection. But my friend liked it. And that night before going to bed, I received a SMS form her which read, “Good night rockstar..tc”. Somehow this SMS really made sense about one thing to me. That music should be not just for our own selfish pleasure. A true musician is one who can actually create a difference in other people’s life. Even a smile is worth the learning.

I am a guy who sometimes watches a movie in theater all alone. I need my space and many a times am locked up in my own self. But this learning that music should be played for others is great. After that I even played a Happy Birthday melody for one of my nieces and she was all so happy because she found it very special. It was not much about the appreciation that I got but the smile which I found on the lips of my niece. It clearly told me one thing that “Dude, you are learning music with the right attitude”. And I guess that’s how a great musician is made.

Purpose of Survival

WHY DO I EXIST??

Now it’s not a cliche sentence. Unless it’s asked out of frustration. But the same question asked with a cool and calm mind surely shows a sign of mature thinking. Sometimes in everyone’s life comes a point where one ponders over this question. Why do I exist? The question is a kind of a paradox in itself, because one can only speculate the answer’s but never conclude any single answer. Now don’t start questioning the importance of this question coz it’s as silly a question like “How did the time begin?” or “When is the doomsday?” These questions are utter nonsensical in our daily life. Similarly, the question about our existence. The answer won’t make any difference in the way we live our life… But everyone is sure to stumble upon this question during the course of what we call as LIFE.

A professional footballer aged 23 playing for a club in some European country and earning a fat salary is sure to make a 23 year old sitting in a third world underdeveloped country wonder about his own existence. Like “What am I doing at 23? Look at that footballer. He is a star. What am I?”

But this question is more drive by a desire to become popular. But now imagine a young girl aged 16 year sitting in her balcony doing nothing and pondering over the reason of her existence. She just wants the answer. It’s just the curiosity. That’s the question I am talking about.

I completely disagree to believe that I am here just to get up every morning to go to office, earn money, spend it with my family and friends, have lot of good and bad time and one day just die. That’s it?? That’s the average life of everyone. Now some people may go on beyond this average life to become someone who can make a difference in the society. Like a President, Social worker, Leader, artist, Journalist, activist etc. But is that again a reason for our survival?? Making a difference. Why should be making a difference be so much of an importance. Why can’t an average life of an ordinary guy be considered worth living? By making a difference, at the most what will happen is one will be remembered forever… Like Mr. Gandhi’s pic got printed on Indian currency. We see him during every money transaction (though credit/ debit cards are preventing us). But the point I am trying to raise is whether a person like Mr. Gandhi has justified his existence? Was his existence more valuable than any average guy? I don’t know the answer… but I would like to believe it as NO.

Just a weird thought… even a prostitute makes a difference to the society by letting her body be used to fulfill the desires of lust. But that’s a taboo in our country. I can really understand why some countries have legalized prostitution. It is a job. Very much a job. Fulfill the need of the people and make profit. That’s the simple and most basic marketing rule. Hahahaa.

So… coming back to the question of our existence. Are we here to just give love? Now the term love itself is so subjective. Let’s not get into it. Are we here to spread happiness? Again a very subjective term. For that matter even a sadist becomes happy when he sees someone suffer. And why is the feeling of being sad projected to be so negative. Sadness, Anger, Jealousy, Greed, Lust are part of human emotions and they are bound to show up from time to time. But then why are they projected to be so bad. Only being happy is good. That’s it. It would have been so boring then. So I don’t think in any way that spreading happiness would be our purpose. Are we here to do good deeds? The outlines of good or bad deeds have been defined by humans. So good deeds are again subjective. I cant understand why helping someone is termed good deed. We are social animal. So helping someone should be a rule or responsibility. But how can it be a good deed? And why is not helping someone bad? In nature animals don’t help each other except someone within a same group or blood relative. But we humans have made rules to help other (which is fine wit me) and also termed it as good (which is not fine with me). So we being here for doing good deeds is again a nonsense thought.

Are we here for just having sex?? According to Darwin’s theory of evolution, mammals and many other beings have this mechanism of reproduction through opposite sex to have a better chance of survival of the species. In genetic terms… Shuffling of the genes to make it more adaptive to the changes in the environment. So we need a male and female who would have sex and reproduce to make sure that the species continues. And then die. And if there is no sex, then no reproduction and no kids and no living things. So it’s like I am a machine with limited functional time and mechanism to create another machine. To stream line this whole process of survival of species, we human have created concept of marriage. Wow… we are smart.

But we being here only to continue our specie is such a weird thought. Coz why is our specie required to exist in the first place? And also why cant we live forever?? Like say gods. Why this tedious process of birth, life reproduction death etc?? I am Clueless.

But now if one looks at oneself with respect to this universe… one would find that we are so minute in this whole vast universe that our survival hardly matters at all. Yes. If tomorrow we all living things are to perish from this planet earth, it will make no difference to the rotation of earth, its revolution around the sun, revolution of the Milky Way, expansion of galaxies time etc. If you see the time from which this universe has existed… you would find that the existence of life on earth has been for just a fraction of time that has passed till now. It means that to space and time, our existence does not matter.

I would like to end this whole topic on a very philosophical note. Yes. The answer to why we exist.

We exist for our loved ones. Let the living being be aside. But if your existence vanishes, the only ones to be effected would be your loved ones. They will keep thinking about your presence. You presence will be stored in their memory till the time of their existence.

But the answer still seems to be incomplete. If God exists… I really wonder why did he take the trouble to actually create LIFE.

Save the Tiger... Crap....

SAVE THE TIGER, 1411 LEFT……WHAT A CRAP.

Hahahhaha… I would have loved to see the expression on your face. Yup. You. The readers of this blog. Now don’t jump to conclusion that I am a cynic. I do become one… sometimes. But now I am not being one. Ok. It’s a very subjective opinion of mine (that’s the beauty of a subjective opinion that nobody can question you….hehehe)…that this campaign is a CRAP. Waste. Useless. Zero on ROI (Return On Investment). Mind you not for the company who made this campaign or the company sponsoring this campaign but for the TIGERS.

This campaign is a hit. No doubt. Everybody just went gaga over it. Awesome campaign. All people seemed to have noticed it (I wonder how many poachers noticed it). The topic is gaining attention like a biggest scandal of the country. (It will even die its natural death like one). People are discussing it during casual dinners and lunch and even tea breaks. It has stirred a emotional cord in peoples mind. And then how can discussions on the virtual world be far behind?? Lots of blogs written on the subject. The topic gaining popularity on twitter and Facebook. The campaign must have done wonders for the sponsors (Aircell) in building the overall brand image. Also the campaign may go ahead to win some never heard of advertising award. The Cub (shown in the ad)… I guess named stripey or stripty, has become the favorite among the crowds (So sad that he/she wont ever know). I guess I may be the only one writing a bit negative about the whole affair. (If anyone out there has same feelings… do reach out… I am so deprived of like minded peoples)

BUT. Here comes some different angle to the whole story. Will this whole awareness drive actually save the Tigers?? I guess not. Tigers will go down. (I don’t want them to… but they will). Poachers just won’t stop by reading this saddening figure of 1411. By the way.. How did they get to this edgy figure? One thousand four hundred and eleven only. Didn’t even leave those eleven tigers to count. From when did our officials became so efficient.. and that too in jungles??? Great. Rather very fishy

So I was saying that the poachers just won’t stop by looking at the figure of 1411. The Cub shown in the ad will surely get shot when he/she grows old. But may be not with a digital SLR camera… But may be with a double barrel long range hunting rifle. Does the campaign tell us how a common man can actually contribute to saving the tiger??? NO. Even if it did… it would not have mattered. You know why. Because nobody is bothered about it. Reaching out the message of depleting number of tigers to a common man just won’t help. Common man is not able to organize efforts to save human life (from terrorism, train travels, road accidents, farmer suicides etc) Saving a Tiger is out of question. Now anyways a common man in the first place should not have the onus of saving the Tiger. I will tell you why.
I myself am a common man. Now the government of India each year spends huge amount of money to conduct entrance exams across the country for the higher posts in various administrative offices like say an IAS officer. Intelligent people clear the exams. Then further they go through other stages of filtering to bring out the best of the best men. The cream crowd. They are recruited at administrative heads of various departments mostly with a fat salary. And also the other privileges enjoyed by Government employee of that level. They can make things happen in terms of administration. Still this campaign expects a common man like me (a salaried employee in a private company who hardly has any time left beyond earning his living and working towards a better future) to react to the campaign and save the tigers. Great. Bravo.

Now the hysteria created on internet by many is also the biggest crap I have come across. Writing blogs or raising the issue again and again. Only discussions. Its very easy to write about saving the tigers on net. And propagating it. You just have to go through some few sites reading about SAVING THE TIGERS. Then vomiting the same thing… raw and fresh on the same virtual world. And height of it all is... people start thinking themselves as responsible citizens to have raised this issue and discussing it.(even if on net) They feel proud to have contributed in national effort in saving the tigers. Hahahaha. Now that’s a real CRAP.

The first step of saving the tigers would start in the forests or jungles of India. In the black markets along the borders where the tiger skin is traded. In the AC conference halls where meetings of top level administrative officers takes place. In the small rooms of our special task forces where strategy to stop poaching is being chalked out.
The Campaign running across our TV, hoardings, radio, and internets can stir them up a bit. But does the Aircell campaign really tell us what steps have been implemented to save the figure of 1411??? But till the time there is no action being taken… I would really love to see this fake concerns among people on net about the Tiger protection to not show itself. Why are people not concerned about Rhino, king Cobra, cruelty towards dogs, sheep’s or any other animals? Concern about tiger is concern towards ecology. But how many of us showing concern towards tigers actually have concern towards ecology??? Do we recycle paper? Do we minimize the use of printers? Do we print on both sides of a paper? Do we switch off lights; turn off taps, wherever and whenever possible to conserve energy. Minimize waste by proper disposal of garbage. If answer to many such questions is NO… then the concern to save Tigers is FAKE. Nothing but a pure mass hysteria. Successful mass hysteria by a successful CRAP campaign.

Let’s see if our grand children will see any tiger in real??? Interesting question... Isn’t it???

A Day In A Life Of A Salesman....

(In the following blog, you may find me considering only men as salesman and not women. But it’s not intentional. So don’t accuse me of being gender biased…. As if I care)

Words like Employee of the month, door to door, pestering, field job, irritating phone calls, targets etc have become very much associated with the word SALESMAN. And it has a reason. Coz that’s all we talk and hear when we discuss a SALESMAN. The perception that he (salesman) would just con (convince) you into buying something (product) absolutely unnecessary to you (actually necessary… otherwise you wont buy it in the first place)… just to fulfill (achieve) his cunning motives (monthly target) has become so much embossed in the minds of most of the people that the word “bugger” is just replacing the word salesman. Am I exaggerating things??? I guess not. Just notice the faces of the people when they encounter any sales man or the pitch and tone of their voice when they receive a call from any salesman... You would see exactly what I mean. But I am not critisicing these general perception about a salesman… coz it has its own reason. The idea of this blog is just to put forward the psychology of a salesman during an average day. It’s like trying to understand what goes in a monkey’s head when he glares at you through the bars of a zoo cage. Sorry if that’s a disastrous example… but I hope you get the drift.

So…first we find a monkey…. I mean a salesman. So I take great honor and also a bit of pleasure to introduce you to our specimen for this topic… its ME. Hmmm… Now just don’t start evaluating the credibility of this blog just because now you know that it has been written by a salesman. Yes…. I am SALESMAN and the first thing that I would like to say (scream) is that a salesman is far more beyond being just a bugger. Some can be sometimes pain in the “you know where”… But let’s not stereotype the whole species of Salesman for this. The sales job has its own up’s and down… has its own adventure and misadventures… But then what the heck…. It’s all in a days work.

The best way to showcase this is to take you through one average day in my professional life. I don’t promise it to be as interesting as going through one average day of John Abrahim (for girls)… or an average day of Katrina Kaif (For guys…) or an average day of Prince of England. But who doesn’t consider himself as Prince in some way or the other. So here we go…. (I just love saying this)

Clock time: 7:30 am
Location: Between the sheets in my OWN bed (Alone)
The Day starts….and I wanna sleep some more. I don’t feel like getting out of those sheets. Not because I am tired and lazy… But may be because at the back of my mind I know that it is going be a long day ahead. So my dad has the task of waking me up. And somehow he succeeds till 8 am. Again coz at the back of my mind I know that being late will cause me one firing squad treatment in Boss’s cabin. I would rather avoid that firing squad. Hey… if so much is happening at the back of my mind… how does anyone expect me to sleep anyways? But I always end up realizing this at 8 am (why not at 7:30 which would have made me Mr. Punctual in office). Time to start the RUSH HOUR. The movie by the same name was nothing. The actual rush hour is what I do between 8 am to 9:10 am.

Clock time: 9:10 am
Location: Mumbai local (just imagine a can filled with people instead of beans)
At 9:10 I get sandwiched between people in one of the overcrowded locals of Mumbai. I never crib about crowded trains. But do feel like punching people who do. Coz they fail to understand the fact that they also increase the crowd due to their own existence. They are also the part of the crowd. But in that crowd I get the 1 hour of leisure time. And then starts the thought process. Recalling all the follow-ups of previous day… Important TO BE FINISHED work from the day before. And speculations of how the work would be today. Ofcourse, in between these thoughts… I do tend to argue with some, fight with some, help some. That’s my train life which will require another whole new blog. Anyways… finally the train reaches the last stop. To me the trains always seem to reach the destination a bit late. After reaching the final station the rush continues… to catch the bus and finally reach the office by 10:15 to 10:30 am. The punctuality is quite bad. Not because my office starts at 10:00 am… But because my boss reaches office by 10:00 am. But then there are ways to just sneak in smartly. (The way is nothing but just praying that boss does not come out of his cabin when I enter the office)

Clock time: 10:20 am
Location: On my desk (Not literally)
Ok. Fresh. Ready to work. Hey... I just got hungry… Ordered a bread-butter from canteen…had it… BURP… Now ready to work. Hey… do you think my personal mails would get checked all by themselves… NO. So I check them… (Also add a bit of orkuting, facebooking, etc)… Now ready to work. But then the discussion about the latest movie/ happening/ events/ office news (whichever applicable or even all) with the people next cubicle ... blah, blah, blah… Now ready to work. Oh… wishing good morning to every Tom Dick Harry in office… OK... Now ready to work. (Stop thinking that when do I actually start my work…I do)
I just wanted to highlight that a salesman also feels like doing the normal TP (time pass) in office. He is just not the workaholic machine that many would want him to see as. But now seriously lets start work. Cause if by any chance my boss reads this… he would doubt the credibility of my work. .

Clock time: 10:47 am
Location: Same office desk (but this time with some work load)
The work starts with picking up the receiver of my desk phone. Every salesman will have the habit of answering the phone with “Yes Sir”. And he does that with six sigma accuracy. That’s just gets into the system you see. Coz a salesman always considers the person holding the phone receiver on the other side of the line as a potential client. And CLIENT IS GOD. That’s his income source. But here’s the catch. In adding the respectful prefix “SIR/ MADAM” he ends up compromising his own intellect. I will tell you how….
Every person when addressed as SIR/MADAM by a salesman just sky rockets his/her self image to very high level (And this is of course irrespective of where he/she actually stands) The next psychological reaction is to create an imaginary intellect level of self and presuming the intellect level of the salesman calling you much below that imaginary level. Hmmmm….. Do I see anyone denying that??? Hmmm … OK. So how many times have you wondered about the educational qualification of any salesman who calls you??? Or don’t you find yourself easily considering a salesman dumb on their simplest mistake. How many times has the thought ever zoomed past your consciously unconscious mind that a salesman calling you could be a genius?? Everyone considers him just another guy who couldn’t succeed in education or career. Anyways…I don’t wanna stretch it too far.
So… every single call I make…. Have to address the people as SIR/MADAM… Whoever the person may be… however dumb he/she may be… whatever the nature may be… Whatever…

Clock time: 11:30 am
Location: Desk… Still over the phone
Did you think that I would just make few silly calls…. Some friendly chats and that’s it. Hellooooo… Wake up… welcome to the real world. I may have to make up to 30 calls to get just a single appointment. Coz that’s the routine after lunch. Meetings. If my boss would have his way, I would have been always outside office doing meetings. Whether with appointments or without them. But my boss is not that bad. Lucky me. Also my phone keeps ringing at regular intervals (It seems that it has been kept on forever snooze). Answering queries, sending mails… (Loads of them) ofcourse with the prefix SIR/MADAM. Hearing the word “BUSY” from people who actually don’t seem to be that busy. People think that just by saying that they are busy, they can avoid a salesman. BUT THEY CAN NOT. A salesman will keep calling you (follow up) till he gets a satisfactory yes or no from you about the purchase of whatever he is selling. Believe me… he would be happier than you to avoid calling you. But his boss is always on his back. We are just like soldiers of a small country against a big country, already knowing that we are gonna die (get humiliated by words like “stop calling me”, “don’t you have work”, “I am busy right now”, “why are you disturbing me”, “I don’t want it, don’t you understand”, “Don’t call again and again” . But we still have to get into the battle field (call the client) on orders of our captain (boss). And it goes on…

Clock time: 12:05 pm
Location: somewhere on the streets.
The real job. Outside the comfort zone of my office AC (which is enjoyed only by receptionist, clerks and jerks). You may most probably find me crossing roads, being crushed in a train, getting pushed in a bus, running after a cab, waiting at the receptions of offices except mine, shouting into my mobile, talking to strangers (coz I meet strangers only). You may rarely find me asking for addresses (coz I have etched a map of Mumbai in my mind by roaming all over the place), having my lunch at leisure, looking chilled out, having some snacks outside (coz I don’t have time for that). And you will never find me enjoying my travel (coz it’s a routine), exploring places for fun (it’s all been explored already) or with out my office bag.
All the people you encounter on the streets with a tie in neck and bag on shoulder… with a hurried pace… blabbering into their mobiles…. You know what I am talking about. An average salesman. Poor chap.

Clock time: 1:15 pm
Location: Who cares???
Its lunch time. Time to do what you earn for. EAT. But I can never predict where I will be having my lunch the next day. It may be some high end restaurant (because of lack of average restaurant nearby) or some road side food joint (same reason). But luckily in a city like Mumbai, we get easy on pocket restaurant at every 30 meters. But there have been days when I have had my food in open food courts and a bird dropping its waste on my shoulder while I was eating my lunch with a semi washed spoon, and in a hardly washed plate. But no complains. Coz that was an experience. And I believe that a attitude is defined by getting different experiences in life. OK. Let’s not get into a psychological topic here. So… the bottom line is…. Location of LUNCH is always a big mystery. But the flip side is I also end up discovering very good eating joints and mostly very economical ones (that’s the need)

Clock time: 3:05 pm
Location: ???!!!
The afternoon location is the diciest. I could be at a plush office reception chatting with a nice beautiful receptionist. Or I could be in a meeting with a client being bombarded with questions. Or I could be on the streets heading towards my destination. And that would have to be in scorching afternoon sun or rains (during monsoon). Both are no fun at all. I feel lucky sometimes that in Mumbai we don’t have snowfall. Or I could be at a bus stop waiting impatiently for the next bus. The places that I have been in my career of two years in marketing are so diverse that it has enriched my experience to great heights. I have been to plush offices which are no less than 5 star hotels. Or say small lanes of Mumbai where a client operates his whole business within the perimeters of his 10 x 10 feet office room. I have been lucky enough to explore places which are so crowded that people cant walk without getting pushed… and places so beautiful… which as a non sales guy I couldn’t have seen. That’s all in a days work. But all this is no big deal.

The biggest deal of being a sales man is meeting different people. All kinds of people. Rude, bad, happy go lucky, sadist, generous, philanthropic, sentimental, egoistic etc. You name the character type and I have seen it. And meeting different characters is what ultimately helps me in deciding to shape up my own character.

Clock time: 5:05 pm
Location: Towards office (Back to the base)
Many a times I have seen this scene when I am heading towards my office and all the people are heading in opposite direction (towards home). It sucks. Not because I am tired and don’t want to work anymore. But more because the sight of people flocking like birds towards their nests also tempts me. But still back to office. While I was out… who did my office work??? No one (coz I am not the privileged few to have a assistant). So finishing that work…. Putting something for next day… Saying bye to every Tom Dick Harry (If anyone is still there) and stroll towards home.

Now what happens after office is my personal life. I am not the salesman anymore. Friends, family, lifestyle, reading, games, late night movies (the reason I don’t get up early). All this makes me the person who I am. Which do reflect on me during the office hours (as a salesman). But mostly ignored by many. For them I am just another guy selling something.

Now whatever I do is not some astronomical physics. It’s something basic done by every other salesman. But that’s what it’s all about. Salesman is not just about a salaried guy trying to sell you something. He is much beyond that with a heart, mind, logical reasoning and lateral thinking of his own. He would probably never ask you to treat him with respect. But inside… he would feel more that just simple nice if you do that. He also knows to build trust. He also knows to keep promises and has business ethics. He also has a work pressure which he balances along with his ego, respect, etc. Great act of juggling out there I must say.

So next time you get a call from a salesman… do try to hear things out and say a polite NO if you don’t want to buy. Wont do you much harm at all. But will do only good.

Not so lucky in love.....

Love…the most beautiful word in the world. I mean almost. But it can be also the most disastrous word of one’s life. But fear not…coz every single time the love factor in one’s life burns to ashes…It again rises like a phoenix to even greater heights. But its not the heights that I am gonna talk about today. Coz the praises of love have been over hyped to ridiculous levels. Thanks to our Bollywood movies. I don’t say that Hollywood does not have a contribution in it…. But then for us Indians Bollywood is the only staple diet for “TEENAGE LOVE LEARNING COURSE”. Hollywood just serves to be the mint or the snacks kind of thing. And then there’s the free lunch buffet…..Tollywood. But thankfully not many people go to eat there and hardly anyone can digest the food. Ok… enough of facts.

So… the focus of discussion is the point when the love “PHOENIX” burns to ashes. Ya…the point when the love just dies. It somewhat feels like… someone has just placed a very powerful sucker-punch in your abdomen at exactly that spot where it hurts the most…and again… and again…. and again the punches just keep coming in. And there’s no stopping them. Coz the punch is coming from your own self.

Before getting on with more such punches…I want to declare that this is mere discussion and does not refer to any PERSON, religion, gender, etc. Please add whatever is remaining…specially the thing that you are thinking. Its just my humble and genuine attempt to present you what goes behind the mind of a GUY for whom his love life just came crashing down. Would be talking about a guy coz have many real life stories in this account. I myself have been the unlucky to have had a first hand experience once during my teens. Also the experiences of many around me have been analysed by me. So I am sure I would be doing justice to the topic.

So…. Here we go….

Love life for everyone is just fantastic. The touch… the caring…. companionship… trust… believe… unconditional love (hey... I recently saw that word getting screwed badly. Now how do words get screwed??? When you say them…and don’t follow them…hahahaha). So in love one would find the solace and also the companionship. It’s magical. Until the spell loses its charm.

And then sets a chain of disaster’s which takes you to such a low level which is normally a multiple of the high level where you had been when in love. In short… you are screwed big time. People have come out of bigger shits… like academic disaster or office goof up or personal issues… But I hardly find anyone coming out tough from the effects/side effects of love failure. Though it’s not something like engine failure of a plane in which you are flying and its 1200 feet above ground. But still the love failure sucks. Badly

Reason for it being such a sucker??? Simple... A vacuum sets in your life. Got the connection?? Vacuum sucks. The life… which you had adapted around that one person, coz she was so near to your heart. Your plans, schedules, holidays, free time, sleeping time were all fine tuned to match that of your partners. And suddenly one fine day, you find the other main component of your clock missing. The clock stops. What to do now. What’s the need now? To come home early from office? To plan the weekend well in advance? To wait for that last call of the day? To hear that sweet voice in the morning? To take time out from your busy daily routine to dream about that special someone?

So what actually goes wrong in otherwise lovey dovey life? Its mostly the case of priorities. When you are not the top most priority in someone’s life… you will find it difficult to give the same back. Then the factors like trust, loyalty also matters. (where most of the lover’s default… only the strong willed comply)

Once the default happens… it goes without saying that it unleashes a wave of anger. THE PERSON, WHOM YOU LOVE THE MOST, HURTS YOU THE MOST. That’s the rule of the game baby. You feel like abusing the person like never before. The intention is never to humiliate, but to showcase the PAIN in disguise of anger. This normally ends up in war of words. Bad words. Really bad words. At some point you feel like hitting the person with all your might. But no self esteemed MAN will ever actually do that. Also you can never hurt your love. People normally consider show of anger as hurting. But its all together different ball game.

And then comes the whole world crashing down. You realize that you have just lost the most integral part of your life. Atleast the part which you considered to be the most integral. You tend to gather the utmost courage and boast yourself of being a freeman. But did you actually wanted to be a Freeman?? NO. You did not. It was so uncalled for. All that future planning, those dreams of a lovely life, those promises of being the most lovable partner…. All that just vanishes in the thin air. Without even a trace of it. Gone in 60 seconds… Or even faster than that. The lovely evening well spent in those loving arms are a distant dream now. Your most trusted asset becomes the most disloyal liability to you. You feel cheated of all the love that you have given. WHY ME? Ya… that’s the question that has been given the duty of hounding you 24x7. And it will do its duty with utmost sincerity.

YOU CRAVE. You crave for HER. For her warm touch. For her passionate looks. For her soothing voice. Her confidence in you. Her trust in you. Her scent. Her admiration for yourself. For every damn little things that was so special. You want her back badly. But are clueless how to get her back. Is there any reason to get her back. Will the love still blossom like never before. You crave for the answers. You are miserable every second. This are the moments when biology plays a very wicked game. As a man you never cried. But these are the days when the moisture in your eyes does not go. It swells the moment you think about the things happened to you. You feel like running away, breaking away, giving in to that urge to scream. Like a mad man. Who cares about the image now? And that feeling of despair. Like a cold dark layer of steps leading to even more cold den. But rather than trying to get out… you kind of start slipping in that den yourself. You tend to close yourself. That’s the final solution. And what was your mistake that you deserve all this?? That you loved her with true heart. So now you have to suffer.

“WHY DIDN’T IT WORK OUT???” “Why didn’t it work out???” “Why didn’t it work out???” The question just hangs there like an object suspended in space. It does not have any kind of self propulsion. No motion. It is there to stay. For many many years to come. May be your death may overtake the answer for that question. AND YOU WOULD BE ONE OF THE MANY UNLUCKY PEOPLE TO HAVE THAT QUESTION UNANSWERED TILL THE LAST BREATH OF YOUR LIFE.

After long break...

I have resumed writing blogs. WOW. It just feels great to make such a sentence. Coz it gives a feeling that i had been writing so many blogs all this years and then took a long break and now back again. But then if i neglect the feeling that I have just written one blog in the past years...the feeling is still there. (OK..now that was a joke and you are supposed to laugh...OK....at least smile...ya...that's the way.)
So I was talking about neglecting feeling. We all do that. don't we?? Whenever the exams results are about to be declared..don't we neglect the guilt that in those nights when we were supposed to study hard...we were more busy dreaming about the girl/boy next door. (and for some may be the uncle/aunt next door ;). And inspite of our repeated chanting that "mein tho fail ho jaunga" we hope to pass the exams with flying colors. [did you know that the word inspite is not in micro soft dictionary...don't ask me why]. So that's just one example of neglecting your feeling. Oh ho...you want some more....OK. Remember the time when we neglecting our feeling towards some person (love, hatred, anger or anything) just coz others did not have the same feeling towards that person.
Conclusion : I am neglecting my feelings.
So i have started writing again. But whats the big deal. The word is not BIG...but DEAL. Everyone thinks in terms of deal. Whats my deal in this. So here is the deal. the amount of upfront bluntness...boldness....fact...and information,....that i will give would be more that enough to take. I am sure that my future blogs will churn the thoughts out of your mind. Coz they are gonna be weird. ya...

To start with i would like to discuss a bit on politics. Today's generation is so eager to point the finger at politicians at the drop of a hat. Hey by the way...what the hell is today's generation. Ppl born in last 20 years or ppl who are tech savvy or ppl who are comfortable with idea of livin relation & F@#k Buddies. (i would like to give a long lecture on livin relation..but later) For me all ppl alive at present are today's generation Some change coz of their fast learning abilities(toddlers and teens), some are adjusting with time and mainly confused (young & mature) and some are too damn rigid to change coz of their habitual to particular style of living (45+) But all in all...every ppl present in this time is today's generation. So I find it funny when teens joke around saying that old generation doesn't understand them. And when old nag around saying that today's generation is weird.

So coming to politics....so easy to blame them. But what the hell. Who are these ppl who do the blame game. Young who dream about leaving this forbidden country to go abroad and settle in some corner of one of the developed country. Or those irresponsible ppl who don't think twice before even breaking simplest of the laws. (Spite here..litter there). Come on ppl...politicians are doing fine. They are doing their best. Is it not real for a common person to fall prey to greed once in a while..whats bad in it. Do you expect GOD himself to come down and get into politics just to make this country good. Is he left with no other work. He is better off planning destruction of planet earth so as to give chance to new species of life. Or may be planning new calamities just to have fun seeing living things get out of it. (Now that is fun..and luxury).

OK..politics..I am so like butterfly...Some ppl even call me that. And that doesn't bother me. Anyways...ya...pls spare politicians. They are part of this government. And so is everyone. Its their duty not to take bribe...and our equal duty not to give bribe. But still how many times have u resisted yourself from taking tickets in black. Or say resisted not cheating in exams. that is also wrong. But if someone is hooked on determining the magnitude of wrong doing ...then no one can help such ppl. I mean just becoz u do only Rs 10 ka goof up and politicians do Rs 100 crore ka goof up...they are more to be blamed. That's the logic we are hooked on. But does it actually stem from the fact that you didn't get the chance to do the 100 crore goof up??? hehehhe...caught ya.

Will discuss this later yaar...my mom is eating my brains so that I may actually eat the vegetables she has cooked. And i wud do that. Who dares to go against women power. (Women power...will have a long discussion on that too) Hey....eating vegetables...whats the deal for me??? may be health. But for now...its mom's satisfaction. hehehe

Do reply if u can....I mean IF YOU CAN....
you say ..whats the deal???? I say....you will get heard.

Ya..that's a big deal....India being democratic..we have freedom to speak...but no source to get heard. Just imagine...who is out there to hear you out. Some guy or gal just becoz you have said those three letter words to them and now they are obliged to hear you. Or those frnds who have their own thought to get heard...they hear you out just to get heard in return. Or that shady Guy or girl who pretends to hear you out just to give an impression of being frndly...and advance one step towards his/her motive (whatever they may be...mostly lust).

ya..so its big deal...YOU WILL GET HEARD. :) "without any motive."

Mom will now kill me...have to go...And I am hungry too....what a deal sirji...

First time...

I have just started blogging and this is my first blog. The first thing that comes to my mind is what the hell was i doing all this years..coz i am 24yr old.
So many thoughts, feelings, ideas etc have just zoomed past my mind, but never could i get a chance to showcase them. But now this blog site is like a forest where there is no human presence and you can just pee whenever u feel like or for that matter just strip whenever it feels so. (I just wanted to potray the feeling for freedom.)
Three cheers to my start. I wish to think not out of box but the thought that there is no box.
Chao..:)